Theyre sweet,loyal, reliable, and communicative.
Relationships ebb and flow.
Plus, if you and your S.O.
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survived the dreaded two-year mark (i.e.
Theres also the three-year relationship problem AKA the three-year itch.
A relationship goes through many ups and downs, including the three-year mark.
After three years together, the honeymoon phase has worn off and now life is lifeing.
What Is the 3-Year Relationship Problem?
The three-year relationship problem is when couples encounter long-term compatibility issues.
The honeymoon phase has ended and real life has settled in.
Some couples grow stronger and more stable while others stagnate because of a decline in passion or life challenges.
Why Is This a Significant Relationship Moment?
It’s also the time when partners start thinking about the future.
The thing about relationships is that you’re free to be totally connected to someone, she says.
You’re attracted to each other and there’s a real spark there.
Havingintimacy and connectionwith your partner is important.
But a relationship cannot survive on love alone.
Both partners must agree on lifestyle choices (at the same time too!)
for the relationship to work.
Others realize they’re better off apart than together.
This often leads to conflicts or a reassessment of the relationship.
Even though you both love one another, communicating will eventually become difficult, and soon resentment will brew.
Naturally, you’re free to try compromising.
You might also start seeing conflict avoidance.
Your partner might believe not talking about the problem will prevent arguments or fights.
Remember, relationships require work, no matter the stage.
But for couples entering or nearing the three-year mark, it’s essential to get on the same page.
That means asking yourself and your partner deep questions.
For example, Brigham recommends thinking critically about the relationship: What does our relationship mean to you?
or How can I love you better?
These questions can be uncomfortable.
Creating a safe and nurturing environment for you and your partner is key to having an open dialogue.
Strategies for Overcoming the 3-Year Relationship Problem
How does one get their relationship back on track?
Communication
Communication is crucialfor navigating challenges at the three-year mark in a relationship, Dr. Douglas says.
Couples should be open and honest about their feelings and needs.
We had to communicate way more and doperiodic check-insjust for our relationship in general, she says.
What could I be doing better?
Is there anything you don’t like that I do?'
Invest in Quality Time
No one is the same person at the start of any relationship.
or calling each other while making dinner.
How do we continue to be loving and kind to the other person?
Once those initial feelings wear off, it’s easy to forget that a person might need more attention.
Address Conflicts
Unresolved conflictbreeds resentment, which can destroy a relationship.
It’s best to address conflicts as they come instead of letting them go unresolved.
Dr. Douglas says to focus on understanding each person and their points instead of arguing.
UseI statementsto focus on your feelings and experiences instead of projecting or guilt-tripping your partner.
Address conflicts as they come up, focusing on understanding each other rather than arguing, says Dr. Douglas.
Keep in Mind
Ultimately, relationships change as people grow.
Communication, conflict resolution, and quality time can help partners avoid falling into the three-year itch.
