That is often an illusion.
At the beginning, we are excited about our new relationships.
We believe were falling in love.
Tim Robberts/Stone/Getty
Some of us getlovesickandlustfor our new partner.
Sometimes we are in the throes of infatuation.
Then, we may begin to struggle.
We are figuring out our partners habits and learning their imperfections.
As relationships progress, conflicts over politics, finances or values may arise.
Frequently there are differences based on two different peoples cultural and socio-economic backgrounds.
Then conflicts appear about how muchsexeach person desires.
Over time, one person may deal with the others betrayal and disappointment may set in.
With a closed or fixedmindset, you dont expect things to change.
Pessimistic thinking can be unhealthy.
Thus, it enhanced the longevity of these romantic relationships.
Heres Why Love Is Not An Illusion
People require social interaction, friendship and community.
While romantic love isnt a necessity, if you look around you, youll find romantic love truly exists.
Its far from a fantasy.
It is connected to social bonding.
Oxytocin is important for sexual arousal, recognition, trust and human connection.
Hallmarks ofhealthy romantic relationshipsinclude commitment, trust, intimacy and passion.
The Positive Effects of Love
Love greatly influences our quality of life.
Its not only an emotional thing either.Love impacts both our physical and mental health.
Links have been found between love and lower levels of stress and depression.
Our risk for heart disease anddiabetesdecreases and at the same time our longevity increases.
Love increases our happiness, self-esteem and resilience.
It also encourages healthy habits and lifestyle choices.
While you might have been hurt in past relationships, its important to recognize the benefits of love.
Relationships and marriages arent for everyone.
But it might not be too late to find a loving relationship if thats what you want.
If youre still struggling about the issue, reach out to a trusted psychologist or mental health counselor.
3rd, et al.
(2019).Optimism is associated with exceptional longevity in 2 epidemiologic cohorts of men and women.Proc.
USA.116, 1835718362. doi: 10.1073/pnas.1900712116
Song H, Zhang Y, Zuo L, et al.
Improving Relationships by Elevating Positive Illusion and the Underlying Psychological and Neural Mechanisms.Front Hum Neurosci.
2019;41:e2019023.
