Some people feel shamed by apologizing, while others feel ashamed until we have done so.
This article explores why apologizing is important and how to recognize when you should say you’re sorry.
It also discusses why apologizing can be so difficult and tips for making it easier and more effective.
Björn Meyer / Getty Images
Benefits of Apologizing
We may have learned about apologizing when we’ve hurt a friendaccidentally or otherwise.
There are several important reasons why apologizing is necessary when social rules have been violated.
Learning the art of apologizing effectively can significantly reduce the negative effects of conflict and relationship stress.
Apologies help us put the conflict behind us and move on more easily.
It can be hard, but it’s well worth the effort.
Why Apologizing Is Hard
Apologizing can be difficult for a variety of reasons.
You just have to know when and how to deliver your apology.
This can help them feel safer with you again.
Creating new rules for the relationship can help you be protected from getting hurt in the future.
Tips for Apologizing
An insincere apology can often do more damage than no apology at all.
In this situation, creating a new rule can help.
For Example:
“I’m sorry I woke you!
Say You’re Sorry
Don’t make excuses or attempt to qualify your apology.
Instead, just say, “I’m sorry.”
Avoid turning the apology into an opportunity to criticize or continue an argument.
An apology does not necessarily involve stating that you did something wrong.
Instead, it may be an acknowledgment that you hurt another person.
(“I am sorrybut….").
you could avoid this kind of circular argument by acknowledging someone else’s feelings and that you hurt them.
