Worrying that your mom hates you is a complicated and deeply hurtful experience.

Your relationship with your mom might feel simpleyouloveand respect them and they love and respect you.

Why Does My Mom Hate Me?

Stubborn mom and daughter avoid talking after conflict

Fizkes / Getty Images

Perhaps the child is feeling neglected or unsupported, and has interpreted this as hatred.

And then theres the its not you, its me experience of growing up.

Well walk you through it.

Your Mother Always Finds Fault With You

Criticismis not always a bad thing.

Constant criticism, however, is not necessarily going to be more helpful.

Take a step back and give a shot to think about whats going on in both of your lives.

Is she really busy with her work or hobbies?

Has she been dealing with health concerns?

Or, if shes been busy, she might not know that you feel deprived.

It might even make you question the closeness and connectedness of your relationship.

Dragomir says that “there could be many reasons for a strained relationship between mother and child.

It could be that the mother is working long hours and feels too tired to engage with her child.

Maybe your mom ignores you and your feelings, which makes you feel unseen and unloved.

Can Moms Be Jealous of Their Kids?

Its possible that your mom is enviousor even jealousof the life youve made for yourself.

You may also feel like your mom makes fun of or mocks you.

Its possible that she doesnt realize her teasing is hurtful.

But thats not always the case, and for some people, moms are where worries and fears start.

Some mothers dont know how to give reassurance and gentle love to their children.

Not only did your mother not help you face your fears, she might have become something to fear.

Why Do Mothers Hate Their Children?

Dragomir says that the mother’s point of view may be quite different to the child’s belief.

Its also a safe place to work on the irrationalguiltyou may have about your mothers behavior.

Tell Your Mother How You Feel

But there can be power incommunicatingyour feelings.

Distancing yourself from your mom can be physical and emotional.

For more mental health resources, see ourNational Helpline Database.

Professionals like your doctor and a therapist are also key parts of your support online grid.

Eventually, youll learn how to be the parent to that little part of yourself.

Parenting Matters: Supporting Parents of Children Ages 0-8.

Washington (DC): National Academies Press (US); 2016 Nov 21.

2, Parenting Knowledge, Attitudes, and Practices.

Thomas P, Liu H, Umberson D.Family Relationships and Well-Being.Innov Aging.

2017;1(3).

Published online January 1, 2022:131-154. doi:10.1007/978-3-031-08801-8_5