Working as apsychotherapistmeans living a life of sacred privilege.
One thing I didnt hear as much during my training?
The intensity of what it is like to be completely present with those experiencing immense emotional pain.
This experience will forever be one of my most humbling and formative journeys.
In this experience, I also learned what it is like to absorb the mental anguish of others.
An Intuitive Gift
As a child, I was innately attuned to the emotions of others.
For example, I could sense if a teacher was frustrated or a classmate was experiencing trouble at home.
In my own home, I was exposed to others' raw emotions daily.
In my work at the trauma recovery center, I would answer calls to the centers crisishotline.
This experience was intimate and challenging.
Absorbing the Energy of Others
A certain alchemy happens within the clinical relationship:transferenceandcountertransference.
The personal management of countertransference is one of a therapist’s most important duties.
This is the delicate dance of being an effective psychotherapist: holding unconditionalcompassionwithout taking on the suffering of others.
Yet, doing so robs the patient of the dignity of their own experience.
It is in these moments my hope is tested.
Other times, I feel disillusioned by the pain humans can inflict on others.
Sometimes I feel angered by the prevalence of interpersonal trauma that plagues our society.
This is when I begin to notice the intensity of the collective mental anguish weighing on me.
My body always alerts me to this discrepancy first.
First, when I begin my day, I start by rememberingwhy I do this work.
This belief stands as my north star in every session I facilitate.
When I end my day, I make a point to leave the work at the office.
Communicating these boundaries to my clients also models that it is OK to haveboundaries in relationships.
After work, I come home and immediately shower.
This is my quite literal way of washing the day away.
Some may be navigating adysfunctional homeand are constantly around those suffering.
Others may be in a relationship with someonegrieving the loss of a loved one.
You may work in anenvironment where many around you are burnt out.
If my story resonates with you, consider how you might adopt some self-care andburnout prevention strategies.
We set boundaries with who and what we wish to keep in our life at a sustainable place.
We end relationships with who and what we feel are no longer sustainable sources in our lives.
“We need each other, but we offer nothing if we don’t nourish ourselves first.
2022;32(1):3-15. doi:10.1080/10503307.2020.1762947
American Psychological Association.
(n.d.).Psychologys diversity problem.
Lorde, A.A Burst of Light: Essays.
Ithaca, N.Y. :Firebrand Books, 1988
