It may be hard or impossible for them to manage or even talk about deep feelings.
Which means they may not be capable of giving you what you need emotionally.
What Is Emotional Unavailability?
Someone whos emotionally available is unable to be vulnerable, either with themselves or with others.
It can be a deep-seated issue linked to someones childhood relationship with their parents.
But levels of emotional availability can also change depending on a persons life stage and circumstance.
Most people will be emotionally unavailable at some point in their lives.
Those kinds of connections are hard to form when youre emotionally unavailable.
To you, this can make the relationship feel one-sided like youre always giving and never receiving.
That can be emotionally draining.
They might have a pattern of seeming disinterested in what you have to say.
As Scott mentioned, emotional availability exists on a spectrum and can be affected by life events.
People are often completely emotionally unavailable when they are struggling with mental illness like depression.
How do you feel about that dynamic?
Consider whether you want to manage your end of the relationship differently.
Get clear and take ownership.Examine your own emotions.
Then have a conversation with them to share your concerns and tell them clearly what you need from them.
Its important to offer them patience.
Be patient with yourself, also, as youre making your own adjustments.
It may be worth seeking professional therapy, either individually or as a couple.
You may be the one who has a hard time tapping into the emotional side of relationships.
And ask yourself whether this is a recent issue, or one that has deeper roots.
Are you avoiding emotions because you feel overwhelmed?
Is this a bigger pattern of interaction for you?
If youre consistently emotionally unavailable, the cause could be traced back to your childhood.