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When planning to have kids, its natural to have concerns.
We may also be asking ourselves the question: What if I regret having kids?
This is a common concern,but one that is rarely talked about.
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Here we take a look at why people may ask this question and what typically causes these concerns.
How Common Is It to Regret Having Kids?
The study researchers further noted that parents in Poland reported higher levels of regret than parents in the U.S.
The data from this study regarding American parents came from a 2013 Gallup poll.
Having kids when the person doesnt really want to can lead to intense feelings of regret.
It can also impact their identity.
The majority of parents didnt regret having children exactly but regretted some of the circumstances surrounding starting their families.
How to Decide Whether to Have Kids
The decision to have kids can be fraught.
There is often deep pressure from othersespecially familyto have children.
We may experience internal pressure as well.
Sometimes we may have a different point-of-view from our partner, which can put extreme stress on a relationship.
Another potential factor is the societal expectation that part of growing up andbecoming an adultis starting a family.
But there is no one right answer to whether or not to have kids.
Livinga child-free lifeis the best choice for many people.
Again, there is no correct answer; its a complex and profoundly personal decision.
Other parents experience more transient thoughts or feelings of regret.
But is it true regret or could it be burnout or even postpartum depression?
Burnout vs.
Regret
Parenting can be extremely challenging at times, and many parents are apt to experienceparenting burnout.
These feelings can resemble some of the emotions that parents who regret having kids experience.
Regretting parenthood soon after becoming a parent can be a sign of a postpartum mood disorder such aspostpartum depression.
Its important to realize that a person who feels this way isn’t alone.
Not every parent finds having children a fulfilling or rewarding experience.
Recap
A person who regrets having kids is not a bad person.
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Moore J, Abetz J.What Do Parents Regret About Having Children?
Journal of Family Issues.
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Sihto, T., Mustosmaki, A.The Most Invisible Maternal Experience?
Analysing How Maternal Regret Is Discussed in Finland.
In: Fitzgerald, A.
(eds) Womens Lived Experiences of the Gender Gap.