According to Minuchin, enmeshed family members struggle to define themselves outside the family.
They have high levels of communication and little physical and emotional distance.
In a study of enmeshed adults, those in the United Kingdom experienced more depression than those in Italy.
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The authors attributed the differences to cultural expectations.
Fear of Conflict
Those who grow up in an enmeshed family tend to be veryconflict-averse.
Difficulty In Relationships
People who experience enmeshment trauma often havedifficulty forming and sustaining relationships.
Low Self-Esteem
Many of those who come from enmeshed familiesexperience low self-esteem.
Heres how to find your own way after growing up in an enmeshed family.
Create Boundaries
Boundaries are your new best friend.
One of the key characteristics of an enmeshed family is a lack of boundaries.
This means you might either ask her to call less often or just stop answering your phone as much.
In an enmeshed dynamic, this will likely upset her.
However, you will know it is the right boundary for you if it helps you feel better.
But as a result, you might not develop a solid sense of self orknow yourselfvery well.
One strategy: Date yourself, as you would a new partner.
Consider working with a therapist so that you dont have to do this on your own.
Be Patient
It took a lifetime to create your current thought and behavior patterns.
It wont take a lifetime to undo them, but it wont be overnight, either.
Be patient with yourself.
Minuchin S.Families and Family Therapy.
2006;68(3):673-689. doi:10.1111/j.1741-3737.2006.00282.x
Bograd M.Enmeshment, fusion or relatedness?
A conceptual analysis.Journal of Psychotherapy & the Family.
2015;29(4):604-613. https://doi.org/10.1037/fam0000118