The goal is to help both partners feel turned on, excited, and ready to engage in intercourse.
It is sometimes referred to as outercourse.
Foreplay is often understood to consist of physical activities, but it can involve mental or verbal activities too.
Verywell / Zoe Hansen
Foreplay is not just about physical touch, says Melissa Stone, specialized sex and relationships expert.
“It’s also about creating a sense of connection and intimacy between partners.
Experiment with different types of foreplay to find what works best for you and your partner.”
And, foreplay can generate lubrication in the vagina, which is important for comfortable and enjoyable penetration.
Not only that, but during foreplay blood rushes to the clitoris.
This gives it an erection, which makes it more sensitive and receptive to pleasure.
This is often particularly important for women, who often require more time to get aroused.
It helps both partners attune to each others' needs and build excitement.
It also creates an emotional and energetic connection, which is so important for sexual fulfillment.
Foreplay generates anticipation, and desire and helps to heighten pleasure and sensation.
It can also really help to rekindle the spark in a long-term relationship.
Melissa Stone, specialized sex and relationships expert
Foreplay is not just about physical touch.
It’s also about creating a sense of connection and intimacy between partners.
To encourage more foreplay in relationships, have a conversation!
It arouses the body, and stimulates the erogenous zones.
Foreplay also helps increase lubrication, making sex more comfortable and pleasurable.
Emotional Stimulation
Foreplay helps to build and sustain an emotional connection with your partner.
It can make you closer, and boost intimacy.
In turn, this can make you feel more aroused for sex itself.
Foreplay Doesn’t Mean the Same Thing to Everyone
People can have differing views on foreplay.
For some people, its a vital part of sex, and of relationships.
For others, its largely unnecessarythey might prefer to get straight into sex.
And LGBTQIA+ people can sometimes view foreplay differently than heterosexual people.
venture to keep the conversation ongoing, as sexual interests can change over time.
Perhaps they dont like using tongues, or they enjoy passionate kissing.
And kissing doesnt need to be on the lips only.
It boosts intimacy and helps to foster a deeper emotional connection.
Massage
Some people enjoy massaging their partners or being massaged themselves.
Like cuddling, it can increase intimacy in your relationship and help you feel closer to your partner.
For some people, messaging or sexting can also form part of foreplay.
Games
Many people enjoy playing games with their partners as part of foreplay.
Dressing up
For some people, dressing up can be an exciting part of foreplay.
If your partner has a particular fantasy, you may decide to dress up accordingly.
Or, some people like to put on blindfolds or handcuffs during foreplayor apply them to their partner.
Intimate touching
Intimate touching or mutual masturbation can form part of foreplay for some people.
It can build intimacy and get you and your partner ready for sex.
What Foreplay Is Not
Generally, foreplay does not involve any penetration.
However, theres no strict definition of foreplay, and what constitutes sex versus foreplay can be ambiguous.
For example, some people may consider oral or anal sex to be part of foreplay.
Whereas for others, they could be the main event that foreplay leads up toward.
What If I Don’t Like Foreplay or My Partners Don’t?
Maybe you dont like foreplay, or perhaps your partner doesnt enjoy it.
While foreplay is certainly beneficial in terms of preparing both mind and body for sex, there are alternatives.
Or, they may simply not think it feels good.
For couples in need of additional support, seeing a sex therapist or trying couples counseling may be helpful.
Frequently Asked Questions
If youd like to improve your foreplay, communication is key.
Its important to speak to your partner to find out what they like and dislike.
You might try new things, like games, or using oils or flavored products.
Or, build up excitement throughout the day.
However, it might not be for everyone, and skipping foreplay might work for some people.
2012;49(5):487-494. doi:10.1080/00224499.2011.598247
