What Is Step 9?

It’s Simple But Not Easy!

Sometimes the injured party is not willing to forgive and forget.

Young man hugging serious woman on couch

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Regardless,spiritual progressfor those in recovery depends on doing their part right and making direct amends.

This step does carry a conditionexcept when to do so would injure them or others.

The benefit of making amends to the recovering person does not outweigh the need to do any more harm.

What Does Making Amends Have to Do With Sobriety?

Alcoholism can be a fatal disease.

Visitors to this website have shared their experience with working Step 9.

Since I spent years in a boozy haze all sorts of hurts were ignored.

Facing the fact that omissions can be painful made this a powerfully healing step to do.

And I keep on working it by staying sober, that is also a form of an amend.

Carol

An Amend, Not an Apology

What is an amend?

The technical answer is an amend is a change.

An amend is not an apology.

It is a clear and purposeful act designed to clear up a problem from the past.

If I owe something material, I pay it back, with interest if necessary.

(What price is there for hurt feelings?)

I have found that there is so much spiritual depth to them.

The truth also set them free.

How blessed we are to become free from our past, and given the gift to help free another.

I would apologize for my mistakes and pray about it to have the knowledge to not repeat my actions.

This what how I felt before coming to Al-Anon.

Out of love,I was trying to help them, I thought.

But now know that I was taking their inventory not mine.

So first I had to make my amends to them.

It sure was healing.

Not as painful as I thought it would be.

The program and this step made me see that it was their own doing; they made the choice.

This makes me realize more and more how much this program is a lifetime program.

And I am glad we have this step, It keeps us honest with ourselves and others!