Avoiding small talk, however, can worsen anxiety in the long run.
Instead, decide on a few things to talk about ahead of time.
This can help build your confidence andimprove your social skills.Here are a few ideas to get you started.
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Are you in the middle of a heatwave?
Find some common ground and build your discussion from there.
You might have to ask several people before you get someone interested in talking with you.
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Be okay with rejection, or even seek it out.
It’s all just practice, after all, and practice is key.
Small talk is about building a bridge between you and another person.
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It doesn’t matter so muchwhatyou talk about, but rather that youstart talkingin the first place.
Sports are always good things to talk about.
If your conversation partner supports a rival team, avoid trash-talking.
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Instead, keep your discussion on things like team or player performance.
You might ask someone, “Did you catch that golf tournament over the weekend?”
Although this might be uncomfortable at first, it will feel more natural with practice.
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Engaging in this key in of small talk helps further yourcommunication skillsand learn a lot about a person quickly.
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Keep food convos neutral andpositive.
Try these:
As with other conversation-starters, stick to positive topics andavoid complainingabout foods you dislike.
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Another popular thing to talk about is work.You might be asked what you do or whether youlike your job.
If you do something unusual that’s hard to explain, consider keeping business cards in your wallet.
You might open a conversation with these questions:
Avoid getting intocomplaints or grievances about work.
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Others might develop unfavorable impressions based on these negative interactions.
People like to hear aboutvacations.
If you travel, be ready to answer questions and give your opinions about places you’ve visited.
People tend to enjoy hearing about favorite travel spots and recommendations.
Your conversation partner might jump at the chance to recount a joyful vacation.
Celebrity Gossip
Joining a Conversation
Trying tobreak into a group conversation?
Establish eye contact, smile, and introduce yourself first.
When speaking, address people by name.
Be sure to ask follow-up questions as you listen to someone talk about their hobbies.
Listen between the lines, as well.
Hometowns
In a small-talk situation, you might be asked about your hometown.
For example:
Have an interesting anecdote or story ready to tell.
Ask others about their hometowns, too; you might find a common connection.
Worst Small-Talk Topics
You’re better off avoiding these topics you’re better off avoiding.
Asking personal financial questions of someone you’ve just met is inappropriate.
Most people will find this question intrusive and inappropriate, especially if they’re experiencingfinancial stress.
Sexand other intimate topics are inappropriate for small talk.
These topics are likely to make others feel uncomfortable or violated.
Deathis another heavy topic to avoid in casual conversation.
In general, don’t bring up emotional, possibly upsetting topics.
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Unless you know someone well, don’t ask about their age orappearance.
Never ask anyone if they’re pregnant or comment on their weight.
(This goes for thinness as well as the opposite.)
This doesn’t mean you don’t have to avoid mentioning these topics entirely.
Past Relationships
Avoid talking about past relationships on afirst dateor within other small talk conversations.
Health issues tend to make poor choices for small talk.
Asking others about their health can come off as intrusive, so it’s best to avoid it.
Asking open-ended questions and engaging in active listening can help you have great conversations with new people.
Avoid complaining, airing grievances, or displaying a pessimistic attitude.
How Do You Avoid Small Talk?
The Takeaway
Starting conversationsand making small talk gets easier with practice.
Rehearse some topics that don’t make others uncomfortable, and avoid controversial and personal issues.
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Brown ML.Learning the art of small talk.
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Kangan Institute.11 tips to help you connection better!
Northwestern Mutual.Why we dislike talking about money and what to do about it.
