According toSan Francisco therapistDr.
Avigail Lev, the dynamics within a family depend on factors such as the number of siblings.
In that case, it can have a significant impact on her relationship and interactions with them.
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The next child gets better treatment, benefiting from the learnings from the first child, Dr. Lev says.
This two-fold threat means eldest daughters often face incredibly high expectations from family members.
These daughters are expected to set the ‘gold standard’ example that other siblings will follow.
This can also put first-born girls in the position of playing the villain orscapegoatin the family.
The researchers suggest that such early maturation enables eldest daughters to help their mothers raise subsequent children.
The Psychological Impact
Being the eldest daughter in the family can come with additionalemotional stress.
They’re more likely to feel shame and guilt but also tend to be more independent.
Eldest daughters may experience tremendous pressure to meet their parents' and other family members' high expectations.
This can make it hard to identify and pursue personal goals that are separate from their family’s expectations.
Relationship Problems
Dr. Lev notes that sibling relationships can vary depending on the siblings' gender.
With younger brothers, there is often less competition and less resentment.
Relationships with younger sisters may be more complicated, she notes.
Self-Esteem
High expectations and perfectionism often leave eldest daughters feeling like nothing they do is good enough.
This can have a damaging effect onself-conceptandself-esteem.
This can create feelings of isolation andlonelinessand make it hard for people to get the support that they need.
Eldest daughters need to find a way to balance their own needs with the family’s needs.
But this isn’t always easy, particularly when you’ve been conditioned to take on more responsibility.
Cultural and Societal Factors
Cultural and societal norms can also contribute to eldest daughter syndrome.
These norms also intersect with traditional gender roles and expectations.
Social and economic inequities also impact eldest daughters in various ways.
“The eldest daughter usually views the family system very differently if she has siblings.
However, eldest daughters should be patient with themselves if they struggle with this process.
Practicing Self-Compassion and Self-Care
Dr. Lev also recommends strategies like practicingself-compassionandloving-kindness meditations.
I found myself adopting a ‘strong facade,’ even when I felt overwhelmed.
In her own life, she noticed that this early conditioning led topeople-pleasing tendencies.
OneTikTok creatornoted the challenges of being the eldest daughter in an African household.
It’s important to remember that every family is unique.
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