Nacho parenting is a technique used in blended families to help define a stepparents role.
In nacho parenting, stepparents avoid disciplining children, leaving this task to the biological parent.
What Does Nacho Parenting Look Like?
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Stepparent families face numerous challenges as the stepparent is integrated into the family.
This is where nacho parenting might come into play.
At the beginning of a stepparent/stepchild relationship, it can be challenging for children to acceptdiscipliningfrom a stepparent.
What Are the Benefits of Nacho Parenting?
This includes the relationships they have with their stepparents.
Nacho parenting is a great way to ease into the stepparent role.
According to Scott, nacho parenting is a great way to ease into the stepparent role.
Nacho parenting also has benefits for the biological parent.
Are There Any Drawbacks to Nacho Parenting?
The stepparent misses crucial chances to bond with stepchildren and establish themselves as caring authority figures, she says.
The stepkids need to see the stepparent implement rules and consequences to view them as an authoritative parent.
This can create tension in the marriage.
The children also learn to exploit the disconnect between the lax stepparent and stricter biological parent, Cook-McKay says.
They behave well for the stepparent to curry favor and get away with more.
How Effective Is Nacho Parenting?
There isnt research about the effectiveness of nacho parenting specifically, but many people find it to be helpful.
Scott says that shes often seen positive results.
I’ve seen it be really collaborative and supportive and create fulfilling and cool family dynamics, she says.
It’s totally possible.
Cook-McKay has seen less positive results.
Here are some expert tips on making nacho parenting work.
Kids can be formally introduced to the idea of nacho parenting, Scott says.
I love it when that’s clearly communicated to kids so they know the expectations too, she says.
“Frustration builds quickly if someone feels unsupported, says Cook-McKay.
She also suggests that you and your spouse decide on a time frame for reassessing.
Nacho parenting should transition within a year or two, she recommends.
This carves out areas for them to nurture and guide, she says.
Just ensure both spouses are actively moving toward team parenting.
Seek Help from a Therapist
Importantly, you dont have to do this alone.
Stepparenting and integrating a new parent into a family can be complicated and isnt without stress.
Seeking professional support can be helpful for all parties involved.
Children who are experiencing behavioral or emotional issues during this time may benefit from individual therapy.
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Jensen TM, Harris KM.A Longitudinal Analysis of Stepfamily Relationship Quality and Adolescent Physical Health.
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American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy.Stepfamilies.
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