Fromsoft launchesto wedding bells, taking the next step in your relationship can feel both exciting…anddaunting.
Lets talk about why.
As commitment deepens, the initial enchantment of love can lose some of its thrill.
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In this realm, you could still be anyone and choose anything.
The moment becomes juiced with erotic novelty.
To want more is to move out of the present and into the future.
The future can be scary with uncertainty, but making plans provides a gorgeous safety to the relationship.
Any unclarified needs, boundaries, or dreams now become clear.
You get on the same page about what’s next and what you mean to each other.
But how do you know when you’re ready to actualize your fantasies into reality?
Here are fourquestions to ask your partnerto ensure your relationship is healthy and ready for the next step.
Do You Both Want It?
Like, Really Want It?
The relationship escalator typically follows this sequence: dating, cohabitation, marriage, home ownership, then kids.
Till death do us part.
For some people, it works.
For other people, its a trap for an unhappy relationship.
Before you talk about whats next, step off the escalator.
Think in terms ofwhyinstead ofshouldorwhen.
Dont do it because it appears perfect on paper or aligns with familial expectations.
Do it because youre sincerely, wildly, ecstatically in love and cant imagine life without them.
Thats the minimum of what you deserve.
Do You Have Proven Trust and Attunement?
As human beings, we tend to repeat patterns.
This helps you understand the capacity as a partner based on their proven actions rather than their potential.
Remember, the strongest predictor of future behavior is past behavior.
How your partner co-creates a harmonious space speaks volumes.
You get each other with almost no words needed because youre fluent in their emotional landscape.
Do You Feel At Home With Each Other?
There is no desire to pretend, play a part, fix, or hide anything from them.
it’s possible for you to be your true and weirdest self.
When all of your parts are unconditionally accepted, it wont feel scary to be seen.
Suddenly, your patterns, emotional wounds, and secret behaviors are laid bare.
There is nowhere to hide.
When all of your parts are unconditionally accepted, it wont feel scary to be seen.
This level of emotional honesty cultivates safety within the relationship, helping you feel at home with each other.
You know you are valued for who you are, and not what you do.
Can the Relationship Handle Disappointment?
But its impossible youre never going to let them down.
Still Not Sure?
If youre hesitant to cause discomfort because theyll be upset, youll avoid sharing your candid opinions.
Imagine how difficult it will be whenemotional avoidanceis no longer an option because your lives are completely blended.
These conversations are hard, but feeling resentment and injustice is much harder.
Or worse, losing yourself in the relationship.
Keep in Mind
There is no golden rule for taking the next step.
you could fill out spreadsheets, engage inrelationship therapy, and rinse through every preventative exercise in the world.
Yet none of these methods can shield you from the unpredictability of committing to a life with another person.
There comes a point where you have to do what you feel is the best step for your relationship.
Know that you will grow into someone who can handle whatever happens in the futureso follow your heart.
Love what you know and trust what you dont.
After all, change is the only constant in the universe.
The Relationship Escalator.What Is The Relationship Escalator?
Attunement Guild.Learn more about attunement as an energy medicine practice.
