The question of whether porn in marriage is okay or destructive is a common concern for many couples.
As a result, pornography use has become more prevalent.
Women also view porn, yet men are still the biggest consumers.
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Pornography use can negatively impact marital intimacy and reduce relationship satisfaction.
It also provides tips for how to cope if porn has become a problem for you or your partner.
Porn in Marriage: What Are the Effects?
An increasing number of couples report that pornography is causing difficulties in their relationships.
It’s even been linked to divorce.
But what is it about porn that harms relationships?
Breaks Trust
Usually, the person looking at porn doesnt want their partner to know.
Keeping secrets from your partner is a recipe for disaster.
This, in turn, can negatively affect your relationship.
But for the majority, research says that porn does the exact opposite.
In “An Open Letter on Porn,” world-renowned clinical psychologists and relationship experts Drs.
John and Julie Gottman write about how porn negatively affects relationships.
Obstructs Emotional Intimacy
Frequent porn use can also cause users to emotionally detach from their partners.
The resulting emotional detachment from sex is very dangerous to the viability of the marriage.
But for some reason, people have difficulty making these same connections when they watch porn.
They forget that real sex isn’t the same as the perfectly scripted scenes they see on the internet.
And research shows that her assessment is spot on.
Many even begin to view themselves as sexually undesirable, worthless, weak, and stupid.
Low self-esteem eventually gives rise tojealousyand overall distrust in the relationship.
Some people may even feel that viewing porn is the same as cheating.
It can be helpful to understand some of the reasons why even a committed partner might view porn.
Research has also shown that attitudes about porn use create more distress than pornography itself.
But if porn isn’t OK with you, then its not OK in your relationship andshould be addressed.
Unfortunately, this is an important conversation that far too few couples have.
Don’t sweep it under the rug.
Yourmarriage may depend on it.
2018;55(6):772-782. doi:10.1080/00224499.2018.1440281
Perry SL, Schleifer C.Till porn do us part?
A longitudinal examination of pornography use and divorce.J Sex Res.
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2020;49(4):1199-1213. doi:10.1007/s10508-019-01616-7
The Gottman Institute.An open letter on porn.
Zillmann D, Bryant J.Pornographys impact on sexual satisfaction.J Appl Social Pyschol.
2015;29(4):1056-1067. doi:10.1037/adb0000114
