It can be particularly confusing for kids who have a parent with a substance use problem.
Children living in homes with parental substance abuse can find life unpredictable and baffling.
Kids may even believe the alcohol or drug abuse is their fault.
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She explains that an age-appropriate conversation about parental addiction helps kids feel safe, cared for, and understood.
Be sure you’re talking to them about what they’re experiencing.
So don’t delay in talking to them.
Dealing with this lack of stability can leave kids feeling insecure and uncertain.
Additionally, they may receive inconsistent messages from their parents.
But it’s one that needs to happen.
They are still being impacted.
It opens the lines of communication, which helps kids feel more comfortable being open and honest with you.
These types of beliefs can lead to unhealthy coping mechanisms in kids, such ascodependency.
You want to be sure you’re sharing accurate information.
Likewise, you should keep your conversations age-appropriate.
Consequently, they will likely blame themselves or believe they did something to cause the addiction.
Also, remind them that you love them and are there to support them.
Your goal should be to keep that from happening.
So, double-check you answer all their questions openly and honestly.
you could also invite the tween to come to you anytime they are upset or confused and need answers.
Finally, when talking with teens, you first need to consider that they may resent the addiction.
Be sensitive to how the addiction has impacted them.
Give the teen opportunities to participate in activities or to take up a hobby that builds theirself-esteem.
At some point, you should talk about addiction as a disease with agenetic component.
By sharing how a parent is maintaining sobriety, this teaches the child coping skills."
And be sensitive to the fact that kids often assume that no one knows what happens in their home.
They also may deny there is an issue, so be patient.
Finally, see to it you approach the conversation withempathyand patience.
Their parent’s addiction is not their responsibility.
Likewise, kids with an addicted parent often develop issues with self-esteem,attachment, autonomy, and trust.
So, what do you tell children when one or both of their parents struggle with addiction?
And, most importantly, they need to know that they are not alone.
All of these things are extremely hard on children, no matter how old they are.
Kids can feel embarrassed, confused, and angry by their parent’s behavior.
verify you validate their feelings and explain that their feelings are normal.
But also remind them that addiction is a disease.
Children need to be reassured that their parents are not “bad” people.
Instead, they have a disease that causes them to make bad choices.
While this pop in of response is normal, it’s not healthy.
Plus, it won’t keep parents from abusing substances.
They did not cause the addiction, and they cannot stop it.
When a parent has an addiction, there is very little safety and security.
As a result, it can make kids feel alone.
Moreover, they’re often convinced that no one understands what they are going through.
Just knowing that there are others who are feeling the same pain and confusion can be comforting to kids.
Consequently, they often feel a great deal of shame and embarrassment about their home lives.
Remind them that they don’t have to lie, cover for their parent, or keep secrets.
Consequently, help them learn these key facts:
Rinaldi also says that talking to a therapist can help.
Involving a therapist can help to increase safe spaces to discuss these topics in a supportive and neutral environment.
Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration.Children Living With Parents Who Have a Substance Use Disorder.
2013;28(3-4):194-205. doi:10.1080%2F19371918.2013.759005
National Association for Children of Addiction.Facts for you.
American Society of Addiction Medicine.Definition of addiction.
National Association for Children of Addiction.Remember the 7 Cs.
U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.Understanding substance abuse and facilitating recovery: a guide for child welfare workers.
