Her humor was sharp and unforgiving.
She was also an anxious driver, a picky under-eater, and a stickler for cleanliness.
The woman who cared deeply about clothes now wears the same pilled sweatsuit days at a time.
Verywell Mind / Getty Images
Still, in some ways, my mother at 96 seems happier than she was in her younger days.
Shes still interested in the news and still surprises me and my siblings often with witty responses.
There are isolated moments when shell get a fleeting grasp of what shes lost.
What has happened to my memory?
‘What has happened to my memory?’
My Mom Is Disappearing.
How Do I Keep My Connection to Her?
Alzheimers accounts for approximately 6070% of overall cases.
How can we continue to connect?
I wont lie: knowing how to engage is getting harder.
But lately, she doesnt want to go anywhere.
I often bring her new clothes, which thrills her, but she rarely wears them.
My brother sees her almost daily.
He plays music, tells her jokes, and walks with her around the tiny courtyard.
But my mother is increasingly tired, and its getting harder for her to focus.
So how exactly do we remain connected to the person we loved before Alzheimers came for their mind?
For starters, she says, its important to remember that the behavioral changes aresymptoms of the disease.
By accepting this new reality, we can approach our relationship with compassion and realistic expectations.
Large tablets with bold markers are an alternative.
By accepting this new reality, we can approach our relationship with compassion and realistic expectations.
For my mother, who never missed her three-mile-a-day walk, walking around her tiny courtyard makes her happy.
Sometimes we talk about her old walking buddy and people she remembers from the neighborhood.
My brother brings a rotating assortment of live flowers to my mom, which she loves.
Turn off the TV or competing noise so that you’re able to focus on each other.
Finally, says Corona-Irwin, just be present.
Offering your undivided attention, a warm smile, or a gentle touch can speak volumes when words fail.
Pay attention to theirnon-verbal cues, as these subtle signals can reveal a wealth of emotions and needs.
In short, connection is connection.
How Do You Connect When Your Loved One No Longer Recognizes You?
First off, avoid putting them on the spot.
And favorite daughter makes us both laugh.
If your loved one does not recognize you, simply be with them in the present moment.
In this way, they are able to share comfortable, companionable moments without expectations.
As you journey though the Alzheimers landscape, there will be grief, but joy need not be absent.
Finding ways to connect with your loved one will bring immeasurable comfort to you and them.
Alzheimer’s Society.How to communicate with a person with dementia.
