Verywell / Madelyn Goodnight
Care and Trigger Warning
This article contains content about suicide.
If reading this brings up uncomfortable feelings for you, you might speak confidentially with trained advocates for free.
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Verywell / Madelyn Goodnight
Suicide is a very complicated topic and can be difficult to talk about, especially with our children.
This concerning public health issue is on the rise.
For instance, in unfortunate circumstances or if they see or hear about suicide in the media.
Approaching the topic will depend on how old my children are and their ability to understand the concept.
By the age of 8, children can generally comprehend the permanence of death.
They understand that when someone passes away, they will not come back to life.
Shame clouds over their loved ones.
Silence and secrets fill the air.
Gossip and speculation run wild but the context and awareness are ignored.
I want to be the trusted adult that they go to first for appropriate information.
Be Direct, Honest, and Non-Judgmental
I plan to be as straightforward as possible.
For instance, I anticipate some of the common questions.
What Does It Mean When Someone Dies?
From the window, she saw the coroner come and take the body away.
She thought death was like what we saw when we played Angry Birds on our iPad.
I had to explain to her that when someone dies, they are no longer alive.
Every living thing will eventually die.
They cannot come back.
Theyre not sleeping and will not wake up.
Their body has stopped working and they no longer need to eat, drink or breathe.
Being on the same page about death makes it easier to talk about suicide.
What Is Suicide?
If they ask whether someone died by suicide, I will tell them the truth.
It might push them to look for information from somewhere or someone else who is not reliable.
Why Would Someone Want to End Their Life?
I wont elaborate, or give my opinion or judgment about why it happened.
Sticking to facts gives them the right information and allows them to think about it independently.
I wont make assumptions about the persons life.
They felt stuck for a long time.
The only way they thought that could end how they felt was to stop living.
They didnt think anyone could help them.
Its important to emphasize that when someone dies by suicide, its not anyones fault.
Its important to emphasize that when someone dies by suicide, its not anyones fault.
This was something my parents never did.
If you or a loved one are in immediate danger, call 911.
University of Utah Healthcare.How to talk to your child about suicide: an age-by-age guide.
Shain B, COMMITTEE ON ADOLESCENCE, Braverman PK, et al.Suicide and suicide attempts in adolescents.Pediatrics.
2016;138(1):e20161420
American Academy of Pediatrics.Suicide: pediatric mental health minute series.
Mental Health Commission of Canada.Talking to children about a suicide.
