Complaining is a natural part of human communication.
It is often a response to problems or a way to communicate dissatisfaction.
Sometimes, however, people might find themselves wondering if they complain too much.
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In such cases, knowing how to stop complaining can help you manage your stress in more adaptive ways.
Its probably not realistic to decide never to complain again, but setting limits can be beneficial.
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Why Do People Complain?
It can be helpful to better understand what causes this throw in of communication.
People complain for a wide variety of reasons.
Byventing their feelings, they hope to lessen the severity of these distressing emotions.
Mood
People may be more likely to complain when they are experiencing negative moods.
The problem with this is that people complain more when they are in a bad mood.
Their complaining then leads to further negative moods, creating a vicious cycle.
Personality
Research suggests thatcertain personality traitsplay a role in how frequently people complain.
Perhaps not surprisingly, people who rate high on the trait calledagreeablenessare the least likely to complain.
Social Factors
Other people can also influence how often people complain.
Being around people who tend to complain a lot can make people more likely to air their own grievances.
Shared complaining can also serve as a form of social bonding.
Its not that most people sit around all day pointing out the negative in lifefar from it.
Yet complaining is human nature.
Most people do need to express frustrations from time to time.
People need to talk to loved ones about feelings, both positive and negative.
They need to seek the opinions of those they trust when facing difficult choices or situations.
These actions can be positive, but it can also often involve sharing stories about problems.
Sometimes that slips into excessive complaining or gossipand that can be a slippery slope.
Are You Complaining Too Much?
How do you know if you are complaining too much?
Notice how much of the content of your conversations is focused on complaints or negativity.
It’s normal to notice that some of your daily communication involves dwelling on grievances or complaints.
This can take a toll on yoursocial support system.
Frequent complaining might also reduce the number of positive influences in your life.
The first step is to become aware of complaining too much or slipping into rumination.
The next step is to try something new.
These proven strategies can help:
Journaling
Writing in ajournalbrings many health and wellness-related benefits.
Instead of complaining to them, laugh with them.
No complaining is necessary.
It’s hard to complain when you’re thinking about how lucky you are.
Research has found that practicing gratitude increasessubjective well-being, life satisfaction, and mood while reducing feelings of depression.
Complaints can be a signal thataction is needed.
Cultivating Optimism
It’s much easier to drop negative habits by replacing them with positive ones.
Replacing negative thoughts and words withoptimistic onesbrings so many benefits.
It’s worth trying, even if you’re not planning on giving up complaining anytime soon.
There are many strategies that can be helpful if you are trying to complain less.
Journaling, finding support, solving problems, and boosting optimism are just a few tactics that might help.
When Is Complaining a Good Thing?
Complaining isn’t always a bad thing.
When done effectively, complaining can actually have a beneficial impact on your well-being.
The key is that it needs to be done in a certain way and for a specific purpose.
Such findings are consistent with other research on emotional expressions of frustration.
This also holds true in online parameters.
Rather than releasing emotions, it tends to amplify them.
So what can you do to make complaining effective and productive?
Limit Your Complaints
Focus on keeping your daily communication primarily positive.
When you do complain, do somindfullyand be aware of how it might negatively impact your mood.
Consider setting aside a limited amount of time to worry or complainabout a problem.
Set a time, and then stop once your time is over.
Complaining can be helpful at times, particularly when it is done mindfully so that address a problem.
Takeaway
Finding ways to reduce complaining can have a positive impact on your life and well-being.
In addition to improving your relationships, it can also help you feel better about your life.
Ultimately, your life is what you make it and these strategies can help you make it more serene.
