The former name is usually their birth name, from before their transition.
That’s because it is known as a specifically harmful act towards people who are under the trans umbrella.
What Leads a Person on the Trans Spectrum to Change Their Name?
FG Trade/E+/Getty Images
People who are trans, GNC, or nonbinary often do something called transitioning.
That is the process of going from being who others labeled you as, to who you actually are.
Transitioning can have many different steps and stages, and is an individual journey.
One common part of that journey is to change your name.
However, the practice of changing one’s first name legally is newer.
Why Is Deadnaming Harmful to Someone’s Mental Health?
Instead, you see them as you choose to, which is not in alignment with who they are.
To instead use their former name is invalidating of a person’s identity, as well as emotionally hurtful.
This is an incredibly disrespectful act, whether done intentionally or not.
How to Avoid and/or Stop Deadnaming Others
As the saying goes, change is hard.
That’s because both are changes that are typical parts of a trans person’s transition.
The ABC method byCollaborate Consultingis streamlined and quick.
Apologize Briefly
The first step to take when you have deadnamed someone is to acknowledge it.
Doing that makes it clear that you understand you’ve made a mistake.
However, when you’ve got apologized briefly you should immediately head to the next step.
Your mistake is yours, so don’t make anyone else have to do any work around it.
Correct
Once you’ve acknowledged your error, immediately use the new name.
This step is also very quick, and nothing further is needed other than the correction.
“I should have said, Sam went there.”
There’s no discussion or processing about the issue needed.
2020;11. doi:10.1016%2Fj.ssmph.2020.100595
