One is typically quiet, relaxing, peaceful, and still.
The other is, well…sex.
But meditation isnotjust about sitting crossed legged on the floor and trying to empty your mind.
Lisa Valder / E+ / Getty
Meditation is simply beingmindful.
So what happens when you combine sensory-focused meditation and mindfulness with sex?
Well, you get something called sexual meditation.
Research shows that combining mindfulness with sex can increase sexual health and satisfaction.
Weve got you covered.
Understanding Sexual Meditation
The concept of sexual meditation is fairly open-ended.
Its simply when you combine sex or sexuality with ideas of mindfulness and meditation.
That can look different for different folks.
Sexual meditation combines the practice of mindfulness and the concept ofbody awarenessby focusing on breath and sensation without judgment.
Its all about allowing yourself to exist and feel all the feels, Howard says.
Thats because sexuality is not just about sexual pleasure or gratification.
Sexuality includes emotional, psychological, and social dimensions, she says.
Its a fluid aspect of human identity that incorporates our sexual preferences, desires, behaviors, and expressions.
and is influenced by not only biology but psychological and social factors as well.
What adding mindfulness does to the equation is that it can make sex all the more pleasurable.
Techniques for Sexual Meditation
Alright, lets get down to business.
How exactly can you integrate sexual meditation practices into your sex life?
Second, sexual meditation and mindful body awareness is something you could do solo, or with a partner.
Its really up to you, and the techniques described below work in both instances.
However you are doing it, Cress recommends starting by setting the mood.
Its okay if you get a genital response, and its OK if you dont.
Youre just here to feel and explore.
If you are with a partner, you could breathe together this way.
Again, keep it a no judgment zone, just letting each other feel whatever you feel.
Take it Slow
Mediative sex is usually by its nature, very slowslow and intentional.
This can be great for many people, but also has challenges.
This slow sensory experience can bring up different emotions and feelings, Howard shares.
Some people laugh, some cry, some have the best orgasm theyve ever had.
Remember, this isnt a time to judge yourself.
This is a time to allow yourself to feel.
Howard suggests paying attention to textures, temperature, and pressure.
Ask yourself questions like, What does it feel like when you breathe in and out?
or How does your or your partners genital area feel under or in your hand?
Howard suggests slowly rubbing your hands over different body parts, placing your attention on skin texture and temperature.
Or use your hand to guide your partner to where youd like them to touch you.
Practice Delaying Orgasm
Howard recommends sinking into each moment during sex, feeling each sensation deliberately.
During partnered sex, go slow and continue to focus on sensations, Howard says.
Pay attention to sounds, smells, and tastes to keep you grounded in the moment.
Often, this slowness means not rushing to get off or orgasm.
Practice edging or delaying orgasm at least three times and focus on the sensations only, she suggests.
Another question people have about sexual meditation is: Am I doing it right?
Howard says that any suggestions about sexual meditations are just thatsuggestions.
You get to decide what feels right for your body, and what meditative sex means to you.
Explore to find out what works best for you, Howard recommends.
But Cress says you dont need to worry about that.
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Proposing an Empirically Derived Classification System.Front Psychol.
2018;44(5):459-467. doi:10.1080/0092623X.2017.1405311
