Many people worry that they lack the belonging and acceptance they require to meet this need.
They feel unworthy or incapable of being loved by othersmaking them question, “Am I loveable?”
Learn reasons why you might feelunlovableand ways to cope with this feeling.
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Find out which option is the best for you.
What It Means to Feel Unlovable
Unlovable simply means not lovable.
So, someone who questions, “Am I unlovable?”
has concerns about whether they are an unlovable person, or not able to be loved.
Causes of Feeling Unlovable
What makes you feel unlovable?
This is because they believe that they need to earn love.
A person who feels unlovable might have difficulty settinghealthy boundaries.
They might not realize that they deserve to be treated well by the people they care about.
Because people who feel unlovable struggle with setting and maintaining boundaries, and abusive people seek to exploit them.
The abusive person will manipulate their victims need for love and then mistreat them.
It is important to remember that no one deserves abuse, and this behavior is never appropriate or acceptable.
They might not realize that they deserve to be treated well by the people they care about.
Simply feeling unlovable does not mean that you are unlovable.
These feelings can lead to spirals ofnegative self-talkbecause you might get angry with yourself for having these negative thoughts.
Notice if you arecomparingyour experiences and feelings to those of other people.
Love is not a finite resource, and there is enough for everyone!
Overcoming Feelings of Being Unlovable
you’ve got the option to overcome feeling unlovable.
Specifically,cognitive-behavioral therapycan help you identify maladaptive or incorrect thoughts and learn to replace these thoughts.
Learning to identify inaccurate thoughts takes a lot of practice.
Everyone has inaccurate thoughts sometimes, and we can work to identify and re-frame these thoughts.
No human is inherently unlovable, so you don’t have to ever accept this feeling.
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