It describes the desire for physical intimacy and refers to physical attraction.
What Is Lust?
“Lust is purely wanting sexual contact,” says Dr. Benton.
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“This is largely selfish with little thought or regard for the other persons well-being.”
Just because you’re lusting after someone doesn’t mean that you might’t or don’t love them.
That said, when people mentionlove at first sight, they are probably talking predominantly about lust.
“Sometimes we have a little attraction, sometimes more.
Sometimes the attraction is immediate; other times it builds after we get to know someone.”
But, What About Infatuation?
“Infatuation can bring people together, but it rarely keeps people together.”
What Is Love?
Dr. Benton echoes these findings.
“Love happens when a relationship has evolved into mutual caring and understanding,” says Dr. Benton.
“With love, people are focused on fostering each others well-being and nurturing the relationship.
It can be less exciting than lust or infatuation, but it lasts.”
Dr. Benton also explains that “love isnt as much of an emotional high as infatuation.”
However, this is normal as we grow more comfortable in our relationship.
Similar to the infatuation phase,passionate loveusually primarily exists in the beginning phases of a relationship.
“In any good relationship, sexual desire increases anddecreasesfrom day to day,” says Dr. Benton.
Can You Feel Lust and Love at the Same Time?
You might not be able to cultivate lust necessarily, but it is possible to build on intimacy.
To do this, Dr. Benton suggests taking alonetime away just for yourselvesas a couple.
The goal is to continue beingopen and honestso that you continually build your bond on a foundation of trust.
If you want toexpress lustful feelingstoward someone, prioritize honesty.
Getting to the point of love takes work.
To reach the stage of love, you oughta take the time to build a connection with someone.
While it may not always feel like a head rush, deeper levels of intimacy are always rewarding.
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Leary MR.Emotional responses to interpersonal rejection.Dialogues Clin Neurosci.2015;17(4):435-41. doi:10.31887/DCNS.2015.17.4/mleary
