But it doesnt have to be difficult.
Especially during difficult times, its easier to avoid facing your stalling relationship or eroded intimacy issues.
Everyone needs their own space and quality time outside a relationship.
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Dating and marriage counselors remind us that you deserve that breathing room.
Esther Perel, MA, LMFT, is a renowned couples therapist, author, and podcaster.
Our need for togetherness exists alongside our need for separateness.
Thus, separateness is a precondition for connection: this is the essential paradox of intimacy and sex."
Individuals need time on their own for personal growth and to maintain independence within the confines of a relationship.
While individuals flourish, the relationship itself benefits.
In fact, its key to successful marriages.
Whether that means reading alone or taking a walking in the park, do it.
Or maybe you want to attend a workout with a friend.
The outcome is your partners bothersome habits will trigger you less.
You’ll find yourself feeling refreshed and being more patient.
Your special partner has time to miss you, too.
Our need for togetherness exists alongside our need for separateness.
Thus, separateness is a precondition for connection: this is the essential paradox of intimacy and sex.
Other boons: youll bring more to the relationship itself.
Stepping away regularly prevents your time together from growing stale.
Instead, it allows for curiosity, more interesting conversations, and growth.
In effect, taking time apart will enliven the relationship dynamic.
But did you know that going to bed at different times negatively impacts you and your partner?
For a healthier relationship, head to bed at the same time.
Whatever the situation,synchronize your bedtimes.
What is an example of blind spots in relationships?
“Sharing this with a partner can be the first step to changing this pattern.
This should be a loving process that builds trust, not one that causes shame,” says Resnick.
Therefore, you should shake things uppepper your routine with unpredictable date nights and moments of fun.
She found many spouses felt like they were in a rut.
Maybe you could find other ways to bring excitement to your relationship.
Psychologists say to focus on novelty, variety, and surprise.
Research shows that after weeks of interesting dates, participants rekindled their love, and the couples felt closer.
Happy couples are kind to each other.
Giving or volunteering to help out is a plus.
In fact, acts of kindness are powerful, andthose that are unplannedtend to fuel overall well-being.
Honor your partnerslove language.
For example, they hug you because they value physical touch.
Its how you fight, and if you fight fairly and constructively, that matters.
The worst thing you’ve got the option to do is roll your eyes or show contempt.
So, what works?
Soften the Start-Up
The emphasis is on your tone and intention.
Speak softly and gently.
Politeness goes a long way.
Whats key is to speak without blame.
Avoid a defensive or critical remark which can cause a conflict to escalate.
Edit What You Say
Dont blurt out every negative thought, especially when you discuss touchy topics.
Remember that you love the other and maintain respect.
Or offer signs of appreciation throughout difficult conversations.
Focus on the Positives
Healthy and happy marriages offer a rich climate of positivity.
For every negative interaction during conflict, a stable and happy marriage has five or more positive interactions.
Share a Loving Story
While it might surprise you, reminiscing can help enhance your relationship.
Your partner will be reminded of why they fell in love with you in the first place.
Another way to repair and improve your relationship is to show appreciation for certain traits your partner possesses.
Always add anecdotes to demonstrate these amazing traits.
Retrain your attention on connection and positive stories.
These surprising but impactful techniques above can help you improve your relationship.
Interestingly enough, research shows its not personality or compatibility that keeps couples together.
Are You in a Healthy Relationship?
2006Mating in Captivity.Harper Collins.
Vogels E, Anderson M.Dating and relationships in the digital age.
