Plus insight into how resentment can impact us over the long term.

People get very attached to their resentments because they are based in the deep sense of being wronged.

The problem with resentment is that its something we hold within ourselves.

Confused Discontented Arab Man Talking On Phone Using Laptop Having Problem With Computer Or Internet Connection At Home. Displeased Male Customer Calling To Hotline Service And Complaining

Prostock-Studio / Getty Images

In that sense, it often ends up impacting us more than it does the offender.

Consider these common reasons.

Its human nature to desire a sense of closure before we can let go of any negative feelings.

We may be waiting for the other person to notice or say something, notesSarah Baroud, LICSW.

A simple acknowledgement of wrongdoing by the other might be enough to allow you to release resentment.

A pointed finger without any conversation leaves us stagnated and bitter.

A pointed finger without any conversation leaves us stagnated and bitter.

That might feel like you lost some battle.

Letting go allows you to finally move forward with your life without an ever-present nagging stronghold.

Releasing resentment might be seen as relinquishing control.

Resentment can often push other people away, warns Dr. Robbins.

They did worse compared to their peers who thought of a time when they forgave another person.

Is the Goal Really to Feel No Resentment At All?

As you walk through life, its completely normal and OK to experience a variety of emotions.

Issues arise when youre unable to move through those emotions and they end up causing harm.

Why are you unable to let go of the anger?

Why in this certain situation do you feel wronged?

And what is the history of that feeling for you?

That can begin to give you some insight into the resentment.

You may not do it perfectly, and resentment may rear its head every once in a while.

But striving to let go and find peace will serve you and your relationships.

2001;12(2):117-123.

2018;37(12):1102-1106.

Social Psychological and Personality Science.

2015;6(4):431-438.