Failure Does Not Define You, It Motivates You…
Many people will go to great lengths to avoid failing so they dont have to feel painful emotions.
There are many reasons why you might be feeling like a failure.
Those feelings are uncomfortable, and many people will do anything they can to escape feelingemotional discomfort.
Researchers discovered that thinking about your emotionsrather than the failure itselfis most helpful.
Allowing yourself to feel bad is motivating.
Our feelings are there for a reason.
It can help you work harder to find better solutions so that youll improve next time.
So, go ahead and embrace your emotions.
Acknowledge how youre feeling and let yourself feel bad for a bit.
Label your emotions as you allow yourself to experience them.
Those things will only provide you with some temporary relief.
Recognize the unhealthy ways you attempt to avoid or minimize pain in your life.
Turning to coping mechanisms that do more harm than good will only worsen your situation.
Not every coping skill works for everyone, however, so its important to find what does for you.
Perhaps you think failure means youre bad, flawed, stupid, or that youll never succeed.
Or maybe you think no one will like you if you fail.
Those types of beliefs are inaccurate, and they can prevent you from doing things where you might succeed.
You may be the key in to blame yourself for everything, even when it is not your fault.
You believe you should have planned better, done more, given more, etc.
You have a ‘martyr’ personality, with standards no one can live up to.
When you think about your failure, look for explanations, not excuses.
Identify the reasons you failed and acknowledge what you’re free to do differently next time.
Research Famous Failures
From Thomas Edison to Walt Disney, theres no shortage of famous failures.
Spend some time researching famous people who have failed.
Youll likely find that they did so many times along the way.
Many successful people continue to fail regularly.
Study what they did to bounce back.
You might learn skills that can help you in your own life.
It can be helpful to see that failure is something that everyone deals with.
Thomas Alva Edison
I have not failed.
I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.
Did you make a mistake?
Did you make a whole series of mistakes?
Think about what you could do differently next time.
Then, you will ensure your failure has become a life lesson that helped you learn something.
Yoda, Star Wars
The greatest teacher, failure is.
Remember thatdwelling on your problemsor rehashing your mistakes will keep you stuck.
Do you gotta take some classes to improve some skills?
Do it’s crucial that you look for a different job?
Do you should probably find some new hobbies?
Maybe you would like some assistance from a life coach or a counselor.
There are many options for people to come alongside you and help you achieve your goals.
Facing your fears, however, can be the key to reducing the discomfort.
Practice steppingoutside your comfort zone.
Do things that might get you rejected or try new things where you could fail.
Over time, youll learn that failure isnt as bad as you might imagine.
Final Thoughts
Sometimes, failure becomes debilitating.
If youre struggling to function after youve failed at something, consider seeking professional help.
